Kelli Raines

How to Deal When Things Don’t Go As Planned



Ever have a time where nothing is going your way? Frustrated… Annoyed… Wanting to tantrum because things are so irritating? Here are the tips you need for how to deal when things don’t go your way.


This is something we can all relate to. I recently had an experience where absolutely nothing went as planned. When it comes to reaching our goals, It’s important to know the destination and then plan backwards from that. The better we plan the more likely we are to follow through and reach our goals.


I recently had set a professional goal for myself and had a clear plan of what needed to be done each day to reach that goal. It seemed straightforward, simple, and I saw no potential roadblocks. But, that’s the thing about life. Sometimes, no matter how strategic and straightforward our plans are, things can still go awry.


When I started this post, I was on a trip I planned where I had set daily goals and the intention of being very productive. This trip was going to be a no brainer.. Seamless in achieving what I set out to do. Or so I thought… However, the universe had other plans.


On this trip, something happened that blocked me from even starting any of the goals I set out to do. As annoying as this situation was, it also got me thinking about how often life throws us curve balls and how important it is to be mindful of how we deal and react to these situations. As much as we can plan and have a “perfect” idea of how things should go, there’s so much that’s out of our control.


How many times have you found yourself in an unexpected situation? Getting a flat tire on your way to work, plans falling through, relationships unexpectedly ending, & the list goes on.


How to deal

So, how to deal when things don’t go your way… Here are some of my thoughts on what helps when things don’t go your way:

  • Step away and give yourself a break

  • Identify what’s within your control and outside of your control

  • Reassess your plans & create a new plan with actionable steps

  • Pause and be intentional about your reaction and actions

  • Vent – Lean on social support, be sarcastic, let it out

  • Take time for yourself

  • Acknowledge your experience – It’s ok to be annoyed

  • Laugh

  • Mindfulness

  • Surrender to the experience - literally “go with the flow”!!

  • Do your best and forget the rest – sometimes that’s all we can do

For me, I did just about all of these to help deal with the epic fail that was my trip. I sent hilarious pictures of everything going wrong to friends, and laughed at the irony of what I was trying to accomplish and not able to do, and finally decided to cut my losses and end the trip early because that was the best next step for me at that moment.


Final Thoughts

The reality is things won’t always go our way… On a date, on vacation, in work, with family, in a relationship, you name it and it will happen at one time or another. Being able to laugh through the frustration and pick yourself back up is the ultimate takeaway from these moments. With whatever you’re experiencing right now just try to roll with it and make the most of the good and bad experiences because they are all part of life. If we don’t have frustrating or challenging moments we may not enjoy the great moments as much.


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I show women how to create a healthy and happy relationship with themselves, by guiding them to break free from their toxic mindset.